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Aunty Meredith's Guide To Not Being A Dickhead

Aunty Meredith has put her teacher voice on and declared what she will not have a bar of at this year’s Meredith Music Festival. If you go because you love the music then you’ll be fine, but if you’re a tosser, then you might be in for a bit of disappointment.

“Dickheads or people involved in dickhead behaviour will usually find that a solid citizen will firmly, but politely inform them that their dickhead behaviour is not admired or appreciated. The dickhead will usually realise they are being a dickhead and pull their head in. If not, our helpers or staff or even security can make a discreet intervention,” was a statement released in the announcement. 

Couches, mascots/flags, glass, portable BBQs, kegs are just some of the things on the no-go list as stated by festival officials. 

This list will hopefully stop any hooligans running ramped and keep the gee times flowing all weekend. With copious complaints in the past with wankers being wankers, Aunty Meredith decided that something had to be done, and it has been declared. Indian headdresses are the most controversial item struck off the allowable list.Controversial in the sense that some hipster white girl will now have to find another festival gimmick to latch on to. The debate over the appropriateness of the headdresses at festivals was a hot topic after Splendour in the Grass last month. One of the most common sights around the North Byron site were these headdresses, with many complaining that they were offensive to the Indian culture.  

Regardless, they’re gone! Oh and security will be asking festival goers to watch and snitch on each other, with a text line being available to dob that wanker with an obnoxiously loud speaker system in.

So be careful all. You better not shout, you better not cry, you better not pout I’m telling you why, Aunty Meredith is watching.

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